A not so skinny cow

I'm convinced that my friends at weight watchers didn't have in mind that 1 skinny cow equals 2 points, and if you can have 22 points a day that's 10 skinny cows. But nonetheless... something to that effect happened. Sorry to admit... I got emotional... and I ate 3 skinny cows in one sitting. What can I say... my veggie burrito just didn't do it for me. Will my friends at Dottie's Weight Loss Zone cringe... probably... does this girl who's way tired and over stressed this week care... I'm willing to bet not.

But nonetheless... I try to stick to the leaf I've turned over... exercise 3 days a week (minimum... and even that's been hard), no more energy drinks, decrease the quickness to anger, breath more, smile more, stand in the sun more....I feel happier. I sort of want my butt to shrink too. I think I'm asking for too much.

The issue... the issue is that for the 4 yeas since having my daughter I can't seem to shed the baby weight. It's officially no longer baby weight. BAby weight is what my grandmother and aunt geri used to refer to my pudgieness as a pre teen.. it wasn't baby weight then either. So when I hear the term I'm actually super offended. I"m going to say that it's.. life happens weight. And with a job that isn't quite as flexible as it used to be.. I don't get in the workouts the way that I once did. So... the world is different. EAting vegetables in mass quantities has commenced and cutting out all of the stuff I love is a new reality. I can't remember the last time I had a real piece of bread, a real piece of chocolate and a piece of pizza. I don't think that I was a crazy bad eater or overeater for that matter... but by paying attention for one week and working out 3 times... I lost 4 pounds. I know that rate won't sustain. But if I could just feel better about myself and not be so freakin' embarassed about my body all the time, things would be looking up.

Am I the only woman in the world who feels more confident, sexier and happier when I'm not this size? I'm willing to bet not. But I wouldn't necessarily consider myself "fat." but... by today's standards, yeah... I am... it's a confusing game... it's frustrating...so I won't allow myself to get crazy... but Iwill allow myself to get healthy(er).

I'm considering trying quick trim... mostly because I love the Kardashians. Is that wrong?